








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 436 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Faceit | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2504 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,293 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1804 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1767 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1508 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2214 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $980,768 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | whalebone | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | KorKross | 57% | 160 |
| #3 | xJaquar | 54% | 169 |
| #4 | Bling2king12 | 54% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | whalebone | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | KorKross | 57% | 160 |
| #3 | xJaquar | 54% | 169 |
| #4 | Bling2king12 | 54% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bling2king12 | 60 | 0.0210 |
| #2 | KorKross | 19 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | xJaquar | 16 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | whalebone | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xJaquar | 863 | 0.24 | 21 min |
| #2 | KorKross | 593 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #3 | Bling2king12 | 342 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #4 | whalebone | 204 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | whalebone | +1.24 | 77 | 58 |
| #2 | Subunnah | +1.08 | 79 | 60 |
| #3 | KorKross | +0.85 | 64 | 69 |
| #4 | xJaquar | +0.56 | 67 | 78 |
| #5 | Bling2king12 | -0.88 | 76 | 42 |





