








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 436 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3276 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,059 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1806 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1192 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1774 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2287 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,298,823 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 362 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ExoticSoups | 69% | 26 |
| #2 | ajstug | 61% | 79 |
| #3 | Private | 57% | 70 |
| #4 | Adept ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ | 54% | 122 |
| #5 | Memester | 54% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jewbrokit | 513 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #2 | Adept ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ | 435 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #3 | ajstug | 188 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | Private | 165 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | Memester | 140 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adept ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ | +4.96 | 85 | 66 |
| #2 | ajstug | +2.23 | 59 | 50 |
| #3 | Private | +1.84 | 71 | 51 |
| #4 | Jewbrokit | +1.54 | 48 | 59 |
| #5 | Memester | +1.22 | 53 | 57 |





