










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 206 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1138 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 986 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12 | 1% |
| Smokes | 338 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 385 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 251 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,096,902 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hot but psycho | 44% | 50 |
| #2 | FighterTom | 42% | 31 |
| #3 | Michiiiiii | 39% | 296 |
| #4 | IClapCheeks | 36% | 188 |
| #5 | Wie geil Boning | 35% | 292 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | FighterTom | 42% | 31 |
| #3 | Michiiiiii | 39% | 296 |
| #4 | IClapCheeks | 36% | 188 |
| #5 | Wie geil Boning | 35% | 292 |
| #6 | SANDY | 32% | 221 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wie geil Boning | 15 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | IClapCheeks | 12 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | hot but psycho | 10 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | Michiiiiii | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | SANDY | 7 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IClapCheeks | 364 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | Michiiiiii | 239 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| #3 | Wie geil Boning | 81 | 0.01 | 2 min |
| #4 | hot but psycho | 57 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | FighterTom | 41 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IClapCheeks | +9.28 | 82 | 64 |
| #2 | hot but psycho | +5.68 | 56 | 51 |
| #3 | FighterTom | +4.39 | 51 | 51 |
| #4 | Wie geil Boning | -0.97 | 27 | 39 |
| #5 | Michiiiiii | -1.30 | 21 | 39 |





