








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1160 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6058 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,767 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2588 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3560 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3135 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2484 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,191,751 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 776 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Wie geil Boning | 41% | 331 |
| #6 | aihooma963 | 40% | 42 |
| #7 | SANDY | 38% | 240 |
| #8 | Michiiiiii | 38% | 197 |
| #9 | The Defuser | 36% | 188 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wie geil Boning | 11 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | SANDY | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | hot but psycho | 7 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | The Defuser | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Michiiiiii | 4 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Michiiiiii | 151 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #2 | hot but psycho | 110 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Wie geil Boning | 105 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| #4 | F1DGET | 98 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | aihooma963 | 82 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IClapCheeks | +7.13 | 80 | 62 |
| #2 | hot but psycho | +2.00 | 58 | 54 |
| #3 | FighterTom | +0.46 | 36 | 56 |
| #4 | F1DGET | -0.78 | 44 | 43 |
| #5 | Michiiiiii | -1.86 | 19 | 38 |





