








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1376 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 422 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




255 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12571 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,438 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12079 | 59% |
| Smokes | 1490 | 7% |
| HE Grenades | 4620 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2249 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,754,040 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1896 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Čiobrelis | 55% | 118 |
| #2 | Makaka | 53% | 51 |
| #3 | Freaky bob | 53% | 114 |
| #4 | Juste | 51% | 115 |
| #5 | purpol | 49% | 138 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Seskus | 47% | 224 |
| #9 | scuffyG | 46% | 124 |
| #10 | scarfz | 45% | 213 |
| #11 | ybf | 45% | 49 |
| #12 | yeatfan45 | 44% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scarfz | 61 | 0.0140 |
| #2 | Seskus | 55 | 0.0122 |
| #3 | purpol | 50 | 0.0182 |
| #4 | yeatfan45 | 45 | 0.0154 |
| #5 | ุ | 24 | 0.0081 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Seskus | 928 | 0.21 | 20 min |
| #2 | yeatfan45 | 460 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #3 | scarfz | 454 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #4 | purpol | 408 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | Juste | 401 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Salieras | +1.51 | 89 | 52 |
| #2 | Čiobrelis | +1.20 | 80 | 59 |
| #3 | scarfz | +0.91 | 86 | 47 |
| #4 | Seskus | +0.73 | 95 | 54 |
| #5 | Freaky bob | +0.52 | 79 | 52 |





