








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 151 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Premier | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1012 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,607 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 922 | 26% |
| Smokes | 314 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 1597 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 774 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $561,505 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 310 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | uwuspankmedaddyowo | 43% | 110 |
| #2 | wormyyyxd | 41% | 22 |
| #3 | Bawt™ | 39% | 76 |
| #4 | SmileyMD | 38% | 138 |
| #5 | STR0NKB0NK | 27% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | SmileyMD | 38% | 138 |
| #5 | STR0NKB0NK | 27% | 22 |
| #6 | Sneker :| | 27% | 30 |
| #7 | HammerCock | 15% | 20 |
| #8 | Nate ツ | 10% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | uwuspankmedaddyowo | 44 | 0.0204 |
| #2 | SmileyMD | 38 | 0.0143 |
| #3 | Bawt™ | 8 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | STR0NKB0NK | 8 | 0.0201 |
| #5 | Sneker :| | 6 | 0.0106 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | uwuspankmedaddyowo | 401 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | SmileyMD | 212 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | Sneker :| | 101 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | wormyyyxd | 70 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | Bawt™ | 63 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wormyyyxd | +6.81 | 78 | 52 |
| #2 | uwuspankmedaddyowo | +3.30 | 69 | 47 |
| #3 | Sneker :| | +2.25 | 50 | 64 |
| #4 | STR0NKB0NK | -0.72 | 29 | 28 |
| #5 | Bawt™ | -1.19 | 39 | 38 |





