








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1273 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 650 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 95 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7823 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 39,864 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 14088 | 35% |
| Smokes | 9904 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 7607 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 8265 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,241,998 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1995 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Av1d | 57% | 53 |
| #2 | SeeOhSeeKay | 55% | 94 |
| #3 | Zaxl | 55% | 89 |
| #4 | tmoe | 50% | 101 |
| #5 | FIREWOULF | 50% | 149 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Riley Reid | 48% | 238 |
| #7 | zap | 46% | 101 |
| #8 | abe722 | 45% | 65 |
| #9 | SilentBang | 41% | 66 |
| #10 | Spike | 38% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Riley Reid | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | FIREWOULF | 9 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Spike | 8 | 0.0078 |
| #4 | tmoe | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | zap | 4 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Riley Reid | 861 | 0.17 | 23 min |
| #2 | tmoe | 501 | 0.22 | 13 min |
| #3 | Zaxl | 448 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #4 | FIREWOULF | 382 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #5 | abe722 | 204 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zaxl | +2.17 | 73 | 67 |
| #2 | Gnome Sayin | +1.40 | 64 | 70 |
| #3 | Spike | +0.68 | 72 | 60 |
| #4 | SeeOhSeeKay | +0.19 | 76 | 27 |
| #5 | Av1d | +0.07 | 48 | 57 |





