








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1856 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 522 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




87 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7772 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,896 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12961 | 54% |
| Smokes | 4530 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3496 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 2909 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,207,217 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5201 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fazeyyy | 71% | 59 |
| #2 | 𝙎𝙃𝙍𝙐𝙉𝙆 | 62% | 97 |
| #3 | Bustxd | 61% | 33 |
| #4 | GiGGleS | 58% | 31 |
| #5 | ! Stean | 57% | 332 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | GiGGleS | 58% | 31 |
| #5 | ! Stean | 57% | 332 |
| #6 | Gully | 55% | 218 |
| #7 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | 50% | 44 |
| #8 | Amyzing | 50% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ! Stean | 45 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | Gully | 34 | 0.0075 |
| #3 | Amyzing | 11 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | 11 | 0.0114 |
| #5 | 𝙎𝙃𝙍𝙐𝙉𝙆 | 8 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ! Stean | 2311 | 0.35 | 64 min |
| #2 | Gully | 834 | 0.18 | 19 min |
| #3 | Fazeyyy | 341 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #4 | 𝙎𝙃𝙍𝙐𝙉𝙆 | 276 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | Bustxd | 147 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | +3.01 | 93 | 59 |
| #2 | ! Wan | +2.44 | 84 | 73 |
| #3 | Bustxd | +2.28 | 70 | 54 |
| #4 | Gully | +2.17 | 75 | 59 |
| #5 | ! Stean | +1.72 | 64 | 73 |





