








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 81 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4740 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,845 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2764 | 47% |
| Smokes | 2029 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 437 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 615 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $409,940 of utility $43 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JabGG | 59% | 37 |
| #2 | ddocss | 54% | 35 |
| #3 | VinnieBB | 50% | 218 |
| #4 | McKrankyStank | 48% | 29 |
| #5 | WelpM3 | 46% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ddocss | 54% | 35 |
| #3 | VinnieBB | 50% | 218 |
| #4 | McKrankyStank | 48% | 29 |
| #5 | WelpM3 | 46% | 52 |
| #6 | i shoot feet | 40% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ddocss | 4 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | VinnieBB | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | i shoot feet | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | McKrankyStank | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | WelpM3 | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ddocss | 173 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #2 | McKrankyStank | 120 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #3 | WelpM3 | 96 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | VinnieBB | 90 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | i shoot feet | 55 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VinnieBB | +3.38 | 78 | 36 |
| #2 | Smile | +1.54 | 68 | 29 |
| #3 | JabGG | -0.14 | 48 | 32 |
| #4 | ddocss | -0.46 | 45 | 58 |
| #5 | McKrankyStank | -1.29 | 39 | 61 |





