








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
660 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,500 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 642 | 43% |
| Smokes | 400 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 64 | 4% |
| Molotovs | 394 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $278,763 of utility $205 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 70 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B U L B U S 4K | 53% | 30 |
| #2 | Arizona Ranger | 52% | 21 |
| #3 | Meep | 51% | 45 |
| #4 | Phijkchu | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | Emma ♡ | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chaotic | 12 | 0.0386 |
| #2 | Meep | 8 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | YodaOrcaMaster | 8 | 0.0379 |
| #4 | stepbro oell | 4 | 0.0187 |
| #5 | B U L B U S 4K | 3 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phijkchu | 212 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #2 | Meep | 177 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #3 | B U L B U S 4K | 120 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #4 | Chaotic | 74 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #5 | Arizona Ranger | 24 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meep | +4.75 | 85 | 61 |
| #2 | Chaotic | +3.85 | 85 | 40 |
| #3 | Phijkchu | +0.21 | 49 | 70 |
| #4 | Cereal | -0.61 | 72 | 46 |
| #5 | YodaOrcaMaster | -1.44 | 39 | 25 |





