








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 194 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 18 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
361 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 816 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 179 | 22% |
| Smokes | 247 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 188 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 202 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $57,649 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fyrtiotvå | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | xs | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | pesse jinkman | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | Kinesien | 72% | 18 |
| #5 | baltic vacuum | 71% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fyrtiotvå | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | xs | 100% | 3 |
| #3 | pesse jinkman | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | Kinesien | 72% | 18 |
| #5 | baltic vacuum | 71% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kinesien | 54 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | baltic vacuum | 39 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | pesse jinkman | 24 | 0.20 | 0 min |
| #4 | Fyrtiotvå | 18 | 0.37 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Invalido | +7.66 | 94 | 69 |
| #2 | Kinesien | +2.78 | 61 | 59 |
| #3 | pesse jinkman | -2.20 | 74 | 57 |
| #4 | Fyrtiotvå | -2.33 | 60 | 85 |
| #5 | xs | -2.59 | 47 | 37 |





