








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1090 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 269 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Renown | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 79 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




227 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11210 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,913 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9656 | 28% |
| Smokes | 10024 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 9064 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 6169 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,162,567 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1199 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Konix_ | 68% | 102 |
| #2 | Naymos | 64% | 113 |
| #3 | Patriotic | 64% | 88 |
| #4 | Aiklight | 60% | 82 |
| #5 | KUROZEN | 56% | 303 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | AlexDrozdzii | 52% | 147 |
| #10 | Chuck Norris | 49% | 67 |
| #11 | bigflouz | 47% | 74 |
| #12 | Joe Biden | 43% | 72 |
| #13 | Alvinroow❤ | 41% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ADN | 59 | 0.0230 |
| #2 | KUROZEN | 32 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | AlexDrozdzii | 30 | 0.0105 |
| #4 | Naymos | 24 | 0.0116 |
| #5 | Noodle | 23 | 0.0105 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KUROZEN | 589 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #2 | Patriotic | 386 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #3 | Darth92 | 326 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #4 | ADN | 264 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Naymos | 217 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheSmooky | +3.12 | 88 | 76 |
| #2 | Patriotic | +2.76 | 65 | 69 |
| #3 | ADN | +2.28 | 85 | 37 |
| #4 | Darth92 | +1.32 | 71 | 58 |
| #5 | KUROZEN | +0.88 | 75 | 62 |





