








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 479 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 113 matches | ||
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5604 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,478 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4740 | 35% |
| Smokes | 4083 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 708 | 5% |
| Molotovs | 3947 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,682,878 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 259 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mapppp | 62% | 69 |
| #2 | barbados slim | 53% | 351 |
| #3 | Bismarck | 52% | 369 |
| #4 | IceCK | 47% | 135 |
| #5 | angsim1 | 46% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bismarck | 1184 | 0.16 | 26 min |
| #2 | barbados slim | 888 | 0.12 | 21 min |
| #3 | angsim1 | 577 | 0.20 | 15 min |
| #4 | IceCK | 414 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #5 | mapppp | 264 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | master yoda | +1.89 | 77 | 66 |
| #2 | mapppp | +0.66 | 73 | 66 |
| #3 | barbados slim | +0.25 | 74 | 63 |
| #4 | IceCK | -0.01 | 71 | 62 |
| #5 | angsim1 | -0.27 | 84 | 69 |





