








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 558 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 73 matches | ||
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2548 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,652 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2857 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2415 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1987 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2393 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $321,635 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 748 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RENE | 95% | 64 |
| #2 | J0hnny | 95% | 60 |
| #3 | roberto | 94% | 16 |
| #4 | chrizZz | 94% | 31 |
| #5 | kressY | 91% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hnny | 7 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | roberto | 2 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | Wheeler | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | chrizZz | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Andyy | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hnny | 193 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #2 | kressY | 146 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | Andyy | 124 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #4 | RENE | 113 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Ign0r4nC3 | 99 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ign0r4nC3 | +3.17 | 94 | 59 |
| #2 | kressY | +3.03 | 76 | 72 |
| #3 | Andyy | +2.83 | 89 | 58 |
| #4 | roberto | +2.82 | 87 | 60 |
| #5 | chrizZz | +2.47 | 84 | 56 |





