








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1224 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September






The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Wingman | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Renown | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5358 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,514 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5641 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3900 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3940 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5033 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,706,538 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 955 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | '死☞Daxtar'☜ | 98% | 51 |
| #2 | LummyTum | 96% | 95 |
| #3 | ecfN | 93% | 57 |
| #4 | SnacKZ1 | 91% | 43 |
| #5 | roberto | 89% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | J0hnny | 87% | 380 |
| #9 | hANNEs | 86% | 106 |
| #10 | chrizZz | 84% | 198 |
| #11 | BingBong | 83% | 40 |
| #12 | Bepli | 66% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hnny | 21 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | RENE | 11 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | chrizZz | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Ign0r4nC3 | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | roberto | 6 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hnny | 1226 | 0.18 | 38 min |
| #2 | Ign0r4nC3 | 461 | 0.09 | 15 min |
| #3 | RENE | 454 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| #4 | chrizZz | 304 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | hANNEs | 273 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hANNEs | +3.50 | 92 | 73 |
| #2 | LummyTum | +3.47 | 89 | 71 |
| #3 | BingBong | +3.19 | 85 | 58 |
| #4 | Ign0r4nC3 | +3.03 | 95 | 55 |
| #5 | kressY | +2.95 | 74 | 71 |





