








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 157 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September






The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2888 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,351 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1966 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1561 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2160 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2664 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $845,372 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ecfN | 96% | 25 |
| #2 | Ign0r4nC3 | 96% | 115 |
| #3 | roberto | 95% | 44 |
| #4 | LummyTum | 94% | 34 |
| #5 | '死☞Daxtar'☜ | 94% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | J0hnny | 85% | 225 |
| #8 | kressY | 84% | 198 |
| #9 | RENE | 83% | 210 |
| #10 | hANNEs | 81% | 62 |
| #11 | Bepli | 72% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hnny | 17 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | roberto | 3 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Bepli | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | RENE | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | kressY | 2 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0hnny | 748 | 0.19 | 21 min |
| #2 | kressY | 675 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #3 | RENE | 353 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | hANNEs | 198 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | Ign0r4nC3 | 193 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ign0r4nC3 | +3.97 | 96 | 59 |
| #2 | LummyTum | +3.70 | 89 | 68 |
| #3 | hANNEs | +3.56 | 91 | 72 |
| #4 | roberto | +3.07 | 88 | 76 |
| #5 | SnacKZ1 | +2.74 | 79 | 78 |





