








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 83 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2152 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,389 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2391 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2051 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1371 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1576 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $541,579 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skooN | 89% | 19 |
| #2 | ¥×Z̷e̷r̷q̷a̷r̷i̷×¥ | 73% | 30 |
| #3 | arNd_ | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | EddezeNNN | 67% | 92 |
| #5 | BaraSara | 67% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Zolo | 57% | 42 |
| #13 | cloverf1eld | 54% | 13 |
| #14 | nutella.com | 53% | 15 |
| #15 | e1nfalt | 45% | 11 |
| #16 | Pressi | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RuflU | 29 | 0.0108 |
| #2 | Zolo | 16 | 0.0168 |
| #3 | Stjáni Guli | 15 | 0.0173 |
| #4 | Blick | 10 | 0.0315 |
| #5 | nutella.com | 7 | 0.0231 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RuflU | 600 | 0.22 | 15 min |
| #2 | EddezeNNN | 493 | 0.26 | 13 min |
| #3 | Zolo | 120 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | VEJAY-_- | 119 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | ¥×Z̷e̷r̷q̷a̷r̷i̷×¥ | 108 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blick | +4.29 | 75 | 38 |
| #2 | ¥×Z̷e̷r̷q̷a̷r̷i̷×¥ | +3.71 | 93 | 62 |
| #3 | EddezeNNN | +2.46 | 84 | 61 |
| #4 | skooN | +2.45 | 81 | 61 |
| #5 | Stjáni Guli | +2.21 | 88 | 49 |





