








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 200 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1348 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,788 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 872 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1032 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 847 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1037 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $406,143 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 67 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ellz | 83% | 12 |
| #2 | ¥×Z̷e̷r̷q̷a̷r̷i̷×¥ | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | FN5_- | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | EddezeNNN | 70% | 27 |
| #5 | RuflU | 69% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | nutella.com | 44% | 18 |
| #16 | Ronald | 40% | 10 |
| #17 | venn1 | 40% | 10 |
| #18 | Bjarni | 31% | 16 |
| #19 | Zolo | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RuflU | 20 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | nutella.com | 13 | 0.0367 |
| #3 | Blick | 8 | 0.0364 |
| #4 | Nonni | 7 | 0.0080 |
| #5 | T0PAZ- | 4 | 0.0110 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RuflU | 312 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #2 | Nonni | 202 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #3 | EddezeNNN | 133 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #4 | Bjarni | 90 | 0.26 | 3 min |
| #5 | Pressi | 84 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EddezeNNN | +3.63 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | mozart | +3.55 | 89 | 78 |
| #3 | viruz #hashtag | +3.43 | 95 | 64 |
| #4 | e1nfalt | +2.97 | 68 | 60 |
| #5 | FN5_- | +2.56 | 72 | 75 |





