








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 284 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1377 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,721 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1551 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1611 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1150 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1409 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $400,399 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 528 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ceptt | 69% | 26 |
| #2 | Kurt tager urt | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | Hj0rt03- | 60% | 30 |
| #4 | Peter Madsen | 59% | 22 |
| #5 | Bang | 52% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Kurt tager urt | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | Hj0rt03- | 60% | 30 |
| #4 | Peter Madsen | 59% | 22 |
| #5 | Bang | 52% | 64 |
| #6 | v0rtex- | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bang | 21 | 0.0158 |
| #2 | v0rtex- | 10 | 0.0129 |
| #3 | Ceptt | 8 | 0.0144 |
| #4 | Kurt tager urt | 7 | 0.0191 |
| #5 | Peter Madsen | 6 | 0.0136 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bang | 124 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #2 | v0rtex- | 90 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | Peter Madsen | 68 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ceptt | 33 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Hj0rt03- | 31 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Peter Madsen | +4.37 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | Bang | +2.57 | 87 | 59 |
| #3 | Kurt tager urt | +2.26 | 78 | 63 |
| #4 | Hj0rt03- | +0.79 | 60 | 63 |
| #5 | 𝐒𝐞𝐣𝐞𝟎𝟎𝟗𝟒 | +0.34 | 68 | 55 |





