








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 259 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1703 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,086 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2430 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1735 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2297 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1624 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $723,214 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 230 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Apclps | 40% | 52 |
| #2 | beetlejuice | 39% | 46 |
| #3 | Lucky Luck | 39% | 141 |
| #4 | koi | 38% | 104 |
| #5 | j-dog | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | koi | 38% | 104 |
| #5 | j-dog | 33% | 18 |
| #6 | Perpf | 33% | 106 |
| #7 | 🅲🅷🆁🅽🅺 | 33% | 40 |
| #8 | _36 | 21% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucky Luck | 11 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | beetlejuice | 9 | 0.0097 |
| #3 | koi | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Apclps | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | 🅲🅷🆁🅽🅺 | 3 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucky Luck | 302 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | koi | 250 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Perpf | 183 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | 🅲🅷🆁🅽🅺 | 159 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | Apclps | 115 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | j-dog | +2.27 | 86 | 76 |
| #2 | Lucky Luck | +1.89 | 70 | 59 |
| #3 | koi | +1.86 | 72 | 71 |
| #4 | Apclps | +1.76 | 74 | 61 |
| #5 | beetlejuice | +0.69 | 62 | 78 |





