








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 479 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 163 matches | ||
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4031 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,096 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3284 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3784 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2139 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2889 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,129,130 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 378 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZaKire | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | How? | 59% | 22 |
| #3 | PlzMoar | 54% | 93 |
| #4 | Xie | 53% | 34 |
| #5 | LeGahSee | 50% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PlzMoar | 352 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | Ericcc | 289 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #3 | virx1 | 261 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #4 | deckle- | 182 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #5 | Xie | 134 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RichMoney | +2.40 | 79 | 65 |
| #2 | Ericcc | +0.81 | 77 | 58 |
| #3 | ZaKire | +0.50 | 63 | 71 |
| #4 | Xie | +0.37 | 65 | 55 |
| #5 | How? | +0.08 | 69 | 61 |





