








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 114 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2883 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,811 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2617 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2561 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1730 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1903 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $251,952 of utility $52 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 574 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ︻芫 一HAMSTER | 76% | 17 |
| #2 | Harvey Specter | 67% | 24 |
| #3 | MaVeRiC | 62% | 37 |
| #4 | Meepster | 62% | 13 |
| #5 | Milo | 58% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kebabushka | 7 | 0.0132 |
| #2 | Zaps21 | 6 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | Milo | 6 | 0.0163 |
| #4 | f y'all | 4 | 0.0134 |
| #5 | K3vin | 2 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zaps21 | 106 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #2 | MaVeRiC | 98 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | PROXC | 89 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | f y'all | 59 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #5 | Harvey Specter | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milo | +2.65 | 74 | 59 |
| #2 | Muumipapa | +2.61 | 89 | 59 |
| #3 | ︻芫 一HAMSTER | +1.46 | 62 | 51 |
| #4 | MADNESS☠ | +1.42 | 65 | 69 |
| #5 | Harvey Specter | +0.82 | 37 | 65 |





