








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 114 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 35 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3308 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,695 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1627 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2580 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1848 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2640 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $306,105 of utility $36 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 214 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ♿⛟ | 46% | 129 |
| #10 | Swoana | 46% | 35 |
| #11 | *sad cat noises* | 43% | 82 |
| #12 | Swapeway | 42% | 125 |
| #13 | french girl power | 40% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faisch | 71 | 0.0181 |
| #2 | G2 Alloyy | 39 | 0.0099 |
| #3 | ♿⛟ | 26 | 0.0100 |
| #4 | french girl power | 25 | 0.0166 |
| #5 | *sad cat noises* | 16 | 0.0104 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faisch | 722 | 0.18 | 17 min |
| #2 | ♿⛟ | 359 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | G2 Alloyy | 291 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #4 | Warlix | 214 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #5 | AZRA 02 | 108 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Warlix | +8.07 | 93 | 75 |
| #2 | monke | +2.96 | 79 | 54 |
| #3 | Faisch | +2.83 | 66 | 50 |
| #4 | AZRA 02 | +2.35 | 54 | 78 |
| #5 | G2 Alloyy | +2.26 | 58 | 31 |





