








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 27 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 100 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1133 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,047 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2363 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2248 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 729 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 1707 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $389,054 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | verottaja | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | mcberd | 44% | 108 |
| #3 | PastoriKyrpäkoski | 39% | 66 |
| #4 | buk | 30% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | verottaja | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | mcberd | 44% | 108 |
| #3 | PastoriKyrpäkoski | 39% | 66 |
| #4 | buk | 30% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mcberd | 30 | 0.0134 |
| #2 | buk | 11 | 0.0214 |
| #3 | PastoriKyrpäkoski | 9 | 0.0071 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mcberd | 542 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #2 | PastoriKyrpäkoski | 65 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | verottaja | 18 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | buk | 6 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PastoriKyrpäkoski | +6.35 | 67 | 52 |
| #2 | mcberd | +1.56 | 46 | 68 |
| #3 | verottaja | +1.54 | 64 | 51 |
| #4 | buk | -1.72 | 55 | 16 |
| #5 | Noah | -3.31 | 33 | 59 |





