








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 427 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 505 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4040 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,514 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3166 | 17% |
| Smokes | 4450 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5179 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 5719 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,480,003 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 754 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Mr.Bager | 40% | 47 |
| #13 | sIW ♿ | 40% | 159 |
| #14 | WHSADV | 37% | 57 |
| #15 | 360HARDSCOPE pidar | 35% | 52 |
| #16 | Heemsk e du | 33% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sIW ♿ | 16 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | mcknn | 10 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Xsmoizz | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Mattepatte | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | kIV | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xsmoizz | 473 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | sIW ♿ | 450 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #3 | mcknn | 315 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Maaki | 218 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | LillMaaki | 216 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nbq | +5.75 | 76 | 59 |
| #2 | kIV | +5.58 | 61 | 73 |
| #3 | Mr.Bager | +4.22 | 48 | 73 |
| #4 | 360HARDSCOPE pidar | +3.86 | 55 | 72 |
| #5 | WHSADV | +3.56 | 48 | 72 |





