










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 193 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1778 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,358 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1256 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1724 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1964 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2414 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $442,329 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 127 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Soeur Frédégonde | 68% | 37 |
| #3 | Anil Brancaleoni | 61% | 178 |
| #4 | J'ai prouté | 56% | 136 |
| #5 | KibiK | 55% | 94 |
| #6 | Daman | 52% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J'ai prouté | 11 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | KibiK | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Daman | 6 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Anil Brancaleoni | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Soeur Frédégonde | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KibiK | +5.37 | 85 | 64 |
| #2 | MVGIIK | +2.30 | 68 | 60 |
| #3 | Daman | +1.32 | 54 | 53 |
| #4 | Soeur Frédégonde | +0.34 | 65 | 30 |
| #5 | J'ai prouté | -0.00 | 53 | 27 |





