








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 798 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5643 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,394 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9018 | 31% |
| Smokes | 7832 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6361 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 6183 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $942,712 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1129 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♡ | 58% | 73 |
| #2 | Asrii | 55% | 64 |
| #3 | PenguinHasFishy | 54% | 37 |
| #4 | SadPeepoJuicebox | 52% | 301 |
| #5 | HelheimWanderer | 45% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Asrii | 55% | 64 |
| #3 | PenguinHasFishy | 54% | 37 |
| #4 | SadPeepoJuicebox | 52% | 301 |
| #5 | HelheimWanderer | 45% | 38 |
| #6 | Pudahtsh Ihtaan | 32% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asrii | 34 | 0.0279 |
| #2 | SadPeepoJuicebox | 27 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | HelheimWanderer | 11 | 0.0150 |
| #4 | ♡ | 7 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Pudahtsh Ihtaan | 6 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SadPeepoJuicebox | 805 | 0.14 | 23 min |
| #2 | Pudahtsh Ihtaan | 310 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #3 | Asrii | 208 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | HelheimWanderer | 121 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | PenguinHasFishy | 58 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SadPeepoJuicebox | +2.16 | 66 | 64 |
| #2 | ♡ | +1.89 | 79 | 28 |
| #3 | Asrii | +0.87 | 72 | 44 |
| #4 | Ld | +0.38 | 35 | 69 |
| #5 | PenguinHasFishy | -0.82 | 66 | 55 |





