








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 511 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 446 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 42 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7020 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,298 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4989 | 26% |
| Smokes | 4972 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4525 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4812 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,314,128 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 808 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CRAP@LAN | 73% | 49 |
| #2 | Kai | 71% | 87 |
| #3 | O-Blivius | 68% | 62 |
| #4 | _Hiru | 64% | 33 |
| #5 | OLD_NEW | 64% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | OLD_NEW | 64% | 33 |
| #6 | Just1ce | 60% | 73 |
| #7 | Ambiguous27 | 56% | 54 |
| #8 | xeace | 53% | 45 |
| #9 | ChΛoS 混沌 | 51% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Just1ce | 11 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | O-Blivius | 8 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | Kai | 7 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Ambiguous27 | 7 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | _Hiru | 7 | 0.0107 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Just1ce | 308 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #2 | O-Blivius | 249 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #3 | Ambiguous27 | 162 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | xeace | 149 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #5 | Kai | 144 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2kLuZ | +3.38 | 86 | 64 |
| #2 | Kai | +2.73 | 77 | 52 |
| #3 | O-Blivius | +1.64 | 79 | 75 |
| #4 | xeace | +1.21 | 81 | 52 |
| #5 | OLD_NEW | +1.07 | 60 | 65 |





