








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 152 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 123 matches | ||
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2592 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,240 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1426 | 17% |
| Smokes | 2115 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2198 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2501 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $996,301 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The G3ck0 | 53% | 110 |
| #2 | .:.Mutzo.:. | 53% | 139 |
| #3 | Mo0se | 50% | 123 |
| #4 | nizzle | 48% | 155 |
| #5 | Sway | 42% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nizzle | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | The G3ck0 | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | Mo0se | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | .:.Mutzo.:. | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Chino | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nizzle | 469 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | .:.Mutzo.:. | 353 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #3 | The G3ck0 | 184 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mo0se | 177 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | Chino | 90 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chino | +1.71 | 71 | 67 |
| #2 | .:.Mutzo.:. | +1.40 | 75 | 79 |
| #3 | nizzle | +1.23 | 68 | 71 |
| #4 | The G3ck0 | +1.05 | 65 | 57 |
| #5 | Sway | +0.92 | 76 | 69 |





