








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 616 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 370 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4608 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,604 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1788 | 15% |
| Smokes | 3500 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2982 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3334 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,779,247 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 618 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | allu | 53% | 118 |
| #2 | EKE- | 49% | 100 |
| #3 | jaetkae | 49% | 82 |
| #4 | Bjot | 49% | 148 |
| #5 | bloke | 49% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | EKE- | 49% | 100 |
| #3 | jaetkae | 49% | 82 |
| #4 | Bjot | 49% | 148 |
| #5 | bloke | 49% | 68 |
| #6 | Linigha mcguiccha | 38% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EKE- | 19 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | Bjot | 15 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | allu | 15 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | jaetkae | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Linigha mcguiccha | 5 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bjot | 802 | 0.27 | 20 min |
| #2 | jaetkae | 536 | 0.32 | 17 min |
| #3 | allu | 236 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | EKE- | 170 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | bloke | 106 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jaetkae | +2.35 | 68 | 88 |
| #2 | allu | +1.86 | 78 | 64 |
| #3 | Bjot | +0.08 | 74 | 67 |
| #4 | *krokodiili* | -0.57 | 62 | 52 |
| #5 | bloke | -1.55 | 61 | 56 |





