








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 287 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 284 matches | ||
| Wingman | 104 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3425 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,516 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1552 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2646 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3045 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 1273 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,457,218 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Godbrand! | 50% | 26 |
| #2 | Jam-37 | 48% | 27 |
| #3 | Just1ceBeav3r | 44% | 88 |
| #4 | yesreK | 44% | 86 |
| #5 | Blackout ッ | 43% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | caYabo | 42% | 134 |
| #7 | Defacto | 42% | 108 |
| #8 | rebz | 40% | 81 |
| #9 | EcliptiC SolaR | 38% | 32 |
| #10 | 51LoveLost | 36% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Blackout ッ | 10 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | Defacto | 8 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | caYabo | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | yesreK | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Just1ceBeav3r | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rebz | 244 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | Just1ceBeav3r | 220 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | Blackout ッ | 204 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #4 | caYabo | 171 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Defacto | 97 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jam-37 | +3.59 | 69 | 66 |
| #2 | rebz | +3.22 | 58 | 68 |
| #3 | Godbrand! | +3.07 | 70 | 44 |
| #4 | Blackout ッ | +2.68 | 71 | 53 |
| #5 | caYabo | +0.36 | 42 | 64 |





