








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 703 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 395 matches | ||
| Faceit | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5412 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,337 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2398 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3328 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5000 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 2611 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,560,561 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 337 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | EcliptiC SolaR | 45% | 51 |
| #11 | rebz | 45% | 94 |
| #12 | Jam-37 | 44% | 63 |
| #13 | ✪ Janky | 44% | 86 |
| #14 | cam | 37% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EcliptiC SolaR | 9 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | caYabo | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Defacto | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | rebz | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Jaywin | 3 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Just1ceBeav3r | 482 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | caYabo | 346 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #3 | rebz | 288 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #4 | Defacto | 223 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | Jam-37 | 163 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SilentBang | +5.08 | 68 | 69 |
| #2 | cam | +4.98 | 89 | 78 |
| #3 | Jam-37 | +3.77 | 71 | 62 |
| #4 | rebz | +2.75 | 52 | 69 |
| #5 | Jaywin | +0.61 | 67 | 57 |





