








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 226 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




65 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1114 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,983 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1648 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1137 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1324 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 874 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $600,818 of utility $211 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 526 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Not Usyk | 50% | 48 |
| #4 | Macalhas3 | 46% | 24 |
| #5 | C3R3L4CPT | 43% | 100 |
| #6 | PAPA COTAS | 38% | 32 |
| #7 | CFB | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | C3R3L4CPT | 42 | 0.0206 |
| #2 | Macalhas3 | 6 | 0.0111 |
| #3 | Not Usyk | 5 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | CFB | 3 | 0.0115 |
| #5 | PAPA COTAS | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Macalhas3 | +3.27 | 57 | 50 |
| #2 | CFB | +2.85 | 50 | 58 |
| #3 | PAPA COTAS | +0.77 | 59 | 58 |
| #4 | Not Usyk | +0.41 | 16 | 49 |
| #5 | C3R3L4CPT | -0.20 | 44 | 57 |





