








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 101 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1339 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,204 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1159 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1407 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2104 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1534 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $538,296 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 175 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | fedda135 | 41% | 127 |
| #8 | Steffoh | 40% | 163 |
| #9 | Ducky | 35% | 40 |
| #10 | Egebakn | 35% | 26 |
| #11 | Don Wold | 28% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fedda135 | 14 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | Steffoh | 12 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Don Wold | 4 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | Ducky | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Fuuma | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steffoh | 292 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | Fuuma | 192 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Don Wold | 118 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | fedda135 | 84 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ducky | 77 | 0.09 | 2 min |





