








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 73 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2421 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,973 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 576 | 12% |
| Smokes | 1778 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1426 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1193 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $746,937 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 117 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snech | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | Don Wold | 57% | 28 |
| #3 | Steffoh | 53% | 216 |
| #4 | Ducky | 50% | 36 |
| #5 | Fuuma | 47% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Fuuma | 47% | 75 |
| #6 | smileyface | 44% | 18 |
| #7 | Malkovin | 41% | 127 |
| #8 | T-dawg23 | 31% | 29 |
| #9 | Egebakn | 30% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steffoh | 13 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Malkovin | 7 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Don Wold | 3 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Fuuma | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Snech | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Steffoh | 367 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #2 | Fuuma | 152 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | Malkovin | 107 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | Don Wold | 76 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ducky | 61 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fedda135 | +2.64 | 80 | 52 |
| #2 | Steffoh | +1.81 | 77 | 64 |
| #3 | Egebakn | +0.35 | 66 | 47 |
| #4 | Snech | +0.25 | 61 | 64 |
| #5 | Fuuma | -1.15 | 59 | 67 |





