








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1703 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 258 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Wingman | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 158 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4862 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,712 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7025 | 38% |
| Smokes | 5417 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2794 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3476 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,633,044 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 698 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XoRRiX | 69% | 35 |
| #2 | L3tz_ | 45% | 161 |
| #3 | Zepher | 44% | 155 |
| #4 | meow | 43% | 61 |
| #5 | Foop | 42% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | meow | 43% | 61 |
| #5 | Foop | 42% | 106 |
| #6 | Dr. Gregory House | 39% | 44 |
| #7 | Po | 36% | 55 |
| #8 | C Dawg | 36% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zepher | 21 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | L3tz_ | 11 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | C Dawg | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Dr. Gregory House | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | XoRRiX | 3 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zepher | 440 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | C Dawg | 217 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | L3tz_ | 167 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | Dr. Gregory House | 160 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #5 | Foop | 153 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L3tz_ | +5.30 | 74 | 29 |
| #2 | XoRRiX | +3.64 | 78 | 39 |
| #3 | Zepher | +3.03 | 69 | 50 |
| #4 | Dr. Gregory House | +1.88 | 42 | 61 |
| #5 | Po | -0.36 | 36 | 62 |





