










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 41 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 49 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1059 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,749 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 889 | 32% |
| Smokes | 743 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 574 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 543 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $287,340 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 139 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Kendrick Ramal | 64% | 22 |
| #6 | ruffinkane0625 | 63% | 8 |
| #7 | Babot! | 56% | 9 |
| #8 | Kommissaire | 53% | 15 |
| #9 | Tr15taN ☁ | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ElDiab3tic | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Tr15taN ☁ | 2 | 0.0165 |
| #3 | Kommissaire | 1 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | Babot! | 1 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | ruffinkane0625 | 1 | 0.0068 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ElDiab3tic | 46 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #2 | Kommissaire | 40 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | ruffinkane0625 | 40 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| #4 | Tr15taN ☁ | 37 | 0.31 | 1 min |
| #5 | Plutotito | 32 | 0.26 | 1 min |





