








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 292 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September






The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
374 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,189 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 369 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1157 | 53% |
| HE Grenades | 32 | 1% |
| Molotovs | 631 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $129,813 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 485 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tent-Sandles | 61% | 18 |
| #2 | toaster | 45% | 76 |
| #3 | ItsDaMurphy | 42% | 19 |
| #4 | PrinceOK10 | 39% | 41 |
| #5 | Riley Mackay | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | toaster | 45% | 76 |
| #3 | ItsDaMurphy | 42% | 19 |
| #4 | PrinceOK10 | 39% | 41 |
| #5 | Riley Mackay | 33% | 18 |
| #6 | Lindsay Muddle | 24% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toaster | 6 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | PrinceOK10 | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Lindsay Muddle | 2 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | Tent-Sandles | 1 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | ItsDaMurphy | 1 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toaster | 127 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | ItsDaMurphy | 52 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | Riley Mackay | 51 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | PrinceOK10 | 15 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | Lindsay Muddle | 15 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tent-Sandles | +2.33 | 44 | 45 |
| #2 | ItsDaMurphy | +2.28 | 34 | 43 |
| #3 | Lindsay Muddle | +0.57 | 48 | 12 |
| #4 | toaster | +0.52 | 30 | 32 |
| #5 | PrinceOK10 | -0.69 | 56 | 25 |





