








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 155 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Esplay | 6 matches | 1,883 | |
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
919 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,799 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 791 | 28% |
| Smokes | 470 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 852 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 686 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $455,610 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 198 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rickard.F_03 | 63% | 32 |
| #2 | dem dead | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | bigman | 61% | 36 |
| #4 | Johjan75 | 59% | 29 |
| #5 | bbl amo | 56% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bbl amo | 7 | 0.0103 |
| #2 | bigman | 6 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | Lars Johan | 5 | 0.0119 |
| #4 | Rickard.F_03 | 3 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | dem dead | 2 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bbl amo | 166 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #2 | bigman | 83 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Johjan75 | 76 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | Rickard.F_03 | 65 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | rip | 33 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bbl amo | +4.68 | 92 | 62 |
| #2 | Johjan75 | +2.14 | 83 | 72 |
| #3 | bigman | +2.03 | 79 | 57 |
| #4 | dem dead | +1.22 | 73 | 43 |
| #5 | FIBBENATOR♛ | +0.61 | 75 | 76 |





