








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 225 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1098 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,701 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 568 | 21% |
| Smokes | 754 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 666 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 713 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $438,213 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 462 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bbl amo | 64% | 42 |
| #2 | MAXI | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | bigman | 59% | 82 |
| #4 | Keki | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Lars Johan | 55% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Lars Johan | 55% | 33 |
| #6 | Rickard.F_03 | 53% | 66 |
| #7 | Johjan75 | 52% | 58 |
| #8 | rip | 51% | 51 |
| #9 | ohlsonz | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bigman | 11 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | Rickard.F_03 | 11 | 0.0082 |
| #3 | rip | 8 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | Lars Johan | 8 | 0.0127 |
| #5 | MAXI | 8 | 0.0190 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bigman | 207 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | rip | 189 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #3 | bbl amo | 143 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | Johjan75 | 138 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Rickard.F_03 | 121 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bbl amo | +4.78 | 92 | 57 |
| #2 | Johjan75 | +3.72 | 89 | 67 |
| #3 | bigman | +2.21 | 78 | 65 |
| #4 | Keki | +1.54 | 91 | 50 |
| #5 | MAXI | +0.54 | 64 | 43 |





