








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1255 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 418 matches | ||
| Faceit | 283 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




92 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12160 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 42,883 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13148 | 31% |
| Smokes | 11584 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 8879 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 9272 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,914,966 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 168 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggsy | 51% | 65 |
| #2 | | 50% | 580 |
| #3 | DeDeXteR | 49% | 234 |
| #4 | Sherlock R. | 43% | 125 |
| #5 | conc1ucteur | 41% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggsy | 51% | 65 |
| #2 | | 50% | 580 |
| #3 | DeDeXteR | 49% | 234 |
| #4 | Sherlock R. | 43% | 125 |
| #5 | conc1ucteur | 41% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DeDeXteR | 26 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | | 19 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Sherlock R. | 14 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | conc1ucteur | 9 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | Eggsy | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | conc1ucteur | 361 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #2 | | 314 | 0.03 | 7 min |
| #3 | Sherlock R. | 311 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Eggsy | 182 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | DeDeXteR | 58 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggsy | +2.85 | 83 | 57 |
| #2 | Tinoa | +1.60 | 72 | 59 |
| #3 | Sherlock R. | +0.79 | 76 | 47 |
| #4 | conc1ucteur | -0.20 | 63 | 46 |
| #5 | DeDeXteR | -0.65 | 63 | 35 |





