








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 576 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2888 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,865 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 652 | 7% |
| Smokes | 3329 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 2173 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2711 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,038,954 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flame | 68% | 28 |
| #2 | LA DENT DE JP | 55% | 40 |
| #3 | Sherlock R. | 53% | 139 |
| #4 | | 50% | 327 |
| #5 | Tinoa | 49% | 234 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | | 50% | 327 |
| #5 | Tinoa | 49% | 234 |
| #6 | Eggsy | 48% | 27 |
| #7 | K4TAN4 | 46% | 35 |
| #8 | conc1ucteur | 41% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tinoa | 21 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Sherlock R. | 18 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | | 12 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | conc1ucteur | 9 | 0.0071 |
| #5 | LA DENT DE JP | 3 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tinoa | 828 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #2 | Sherlock R. | 330 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | conc1ucteur | 280 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #4 | | 144 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| #5 | K4TAN4 | 72 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flame | +4.84 | 87 | 51 |
| #2 | Tinoa | +3.11 | 72 | 58 |
| #3 | Eggsy | +2.90 | 79 | 58 |
| #4 | Sherlock R. | +1.21 | 74 | 49 |
| #5 | K4TAN4 | +0.09 | 34 | 54 |





