








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 422 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 127 matches | ||
| Wingman | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




97 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3468 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,452 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2506 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3047 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2745 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2154 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,092,446 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 322 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SuveJones | 59% | 39 |
| #2 | Bakir Sejfić | 53% | 30 |
| #3 | Yks palli | 47% | 262 |
| #4 | TaZeee | 47% | 58 |
| #5 | Naapuri | 46% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Julleva687 | 46% | 59 |
| #7 | korjen orqu (2) | 44% | 156 |
| #8 | Schmutz | 32% | 38 |
| #9 | HiiriHiirulainen | 30% | 27 |
| #10 | aapo! | 29% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yks palli | 63 | 0.0123 |
| #2 | Julleva687 | 14 | 0.0135 |
| #3 | Naapuri | 12 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | TaZeee | 12 | 0.0100 |
| #5 | korjen orqu (2) | 9 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yks palli | 386 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #2 | Naapuri | 385 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | korjen orqu (2) | 231 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | TaZeee | 207 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | Schmutz | 138 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yks palli | +3.77 | 84 | 52 |
| #2 | Naapuri | +2.70 | 79 | 59 |
| #3 | Bakir Sejfić | +2.49 | 70 | 67 |
| #4 | aapo! | +2.17 | 84 | 54 |
| #5 | TaZeee | +2.09 | 70 | 67 |





