








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 221 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1997 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,829 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2612 | 38% |
| Smokes | 691 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 1728 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1798 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $273,412 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MysticalWafflez | 73% | 52 |
| #2 | duf | 62% | 21 |
| #3 | CSGORage.com | 61% | 33 |
| #4 | Turner | 60% | 15 |
| #5 | Chand3mic | 60% | 163 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Turner | 60% | 15 |
| #5 | Chand3mic | 60% | 163 |
| #6 | Big Smoke | 56% | 86 |
| #7 | Ja$on | 45% | 11 |
| #8 | MagicDrip | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chand3mic | 22 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Big Smoke | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | MysticalWafflez | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | CSGORage.com | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | duf | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chand3mic | 454 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #2 | MysticalWafflez | 221 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #3 | Big Smoke | 162 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | CSGORage.com | 139 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #5 | Turner | 40 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | duf | +2.86 | 66 | 40 |
| #2 | MysticalWafflez | +1.84 | 71 | 67 |
| #3 | 👽 𝕊 𝕌 𝕊 👽 | +1.52 | 76 | 62 |
| #4 | Chand3mic | +1.06 | 69 | 62 |
| #5 | Ja$on | -0.41 | 80 | 55 |





