








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 107 matches | ||
| Premier | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1757 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,988 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 792 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1682 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1242 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1272 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $458,783 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | charlesouel37 | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | Phromage | 63% | 19 |
| #3 | Sauf une fois au chalet | 57% | 282 |
| #4 | Johnny Sins | 50% | 38 |
| #5 | Sal Vulcano | 49% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Sauf une fois au chalet | 57% | 282 |
| #4 | Johnny Sins | 50% | 38 |
| #5 | Sal Vulcano | 49% | 116 |
| #6 | SLARO | 44% | 66 |
| #7 | Merlin_Da_Wizurd | 39% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sauf une fois au chalet | 20 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | SLARO | 8 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | Merlin_Da_Wizurd | 8 | 0.0104 |
| #4 | Sal Vulcano | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Johnny Sins | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sauf une fois au chalet | 122 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| #2 | SLARO | 118 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Merlin_Da_Wizurd | 76 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Sal Vulcano | 75 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | Johnny Sins | 33 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SLARO | +3.07 | 75 | 54 |
| #2 | Sauf une fois au chalet | +2.31 | 67 | 30 |
| #3 | Johnny Sins | +2.30 | 59 | 35 |
| #4 | Phromage | +0.22 | 50 | 43 |
| #5 | WonkaTruck | +0.16 | 56 | 42 |





