








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1797 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 622 matches | ||
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7435 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,048 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13276 | 38% |
| Smokes | 10920 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3585 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 7267 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,877,772 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 823 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Get Racc'd | 76% | 55 |
| #2 | tamerlaneい河正の 꿈 | 66% | 121 |
| #3 | TheHelplessCow | 66% | 99 |
| #4 | R3XY | 65% | 463 |
| #5 | ffalcon | 62% | 268 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | PorkRoll | 57% | 95 |
| #10 | m1r | 53% | 47 |
| #11 | byte | 52% | 42 |
| #12 | ✪ GReeDo | 51% | 49 |
| #13 | Senpizzy | 49% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R3XY | 26 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | ffalcon | 10 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | JZS | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Get Racc'd | 5 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | ✪ GReeDo | 4 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R3XY | 2076 | 0.21 | 55 min |
| #2 | ffalcon | 1415 | 0.26 | 35 min |
| #3 | JZS | 415 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | tamerlaneい河正の 꿈 | 393 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #5 | Senpizzy | 360 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tamerlaneい河正の 꿈 | +2.21 | 73 | 73 |
| #2 | R3XY | +1.70 | 76 | 65 |
| #3 | wex | +1.67 | 84 | 52 |
| #4 | TheHelplessCow | +1.00 | 79 | 48 |
| #5 | Flame † | +0.75 | 72 | 65 |





