










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 856 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 212 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 167 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 103 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 49 matches | ||
| Premier | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 33 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8247 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,824 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9618 | 29% |
| Smokes | 10154 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5499 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 7553 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,642,489 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 555 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NxBxdy | 57% | 47 |
| #2 | bomber rat | 57% | 70 |
| #3 | nutsack_99 - gaming since 2009 | 53% | 253 |
| #4 | ⛟ | 53% | 458 |
| #5 | Ronti | 52% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Ronti | 52% | 115 |
| #6 | Dawg | 51% | 506 |
| #7 | ⛧L33⛧ | 48% | 66 |
| #8 | henqka | 48% | 243 |
| #9 | Sami the public racist | 41% | 298 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⛟ | 74 | 0.0080 |
| #2 | Sami the public racist | 31 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | Dawg | 19 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | henqka | 17 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | nutsack_99 - gaming since 2009 | 9 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dawg | 2232 | 0.22 | 48 min |
| #2 | ⛟ | 2015 | 0.22 | 54 min |
| #3 | henqka | 1223 | 0.25 | 33 min |
| #4 | Sami the public racist | 979 | 0.17 | 23 min |
| #5 | nutsack_99 - gaming since 2009 | 396 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⛟ | +4.53 | 83 | 72 |
| #2 | n1blo | +2.23 | 74 | 66 |
| #3 | NxBxdy | +1.01 | 75 | 61 |
| #4 | nutsack_99 - gaming since 2009 | -0.20 | 69 | 50 |
| #5 | henqka | -0.51 | 51 | 72 |





