








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1582 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,468 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1095 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1306 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1501 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1566 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $178,044 of utility $49 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 36 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 丂ㄩㄩ尺爪丨乇丂 | 8 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | Salam | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | seNji- | 5 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | Elmor:D😮💨😎 | 3 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | TT : pietuu__ | 2 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Salam | 382 | 0.16 | 10 min |
| #2 | 丂ㄩㄩ尺爪丨乇丂 | 313 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #3 | Joppe | 86 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | seNji- | 67 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Jarkko | 58 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elmor:D😮💨😎 | +5.57 | 83 | 66 |
| #2 | seNji- | +2.29 | 57 | 65 |
| #3 | zeizei | +1.84 | 65 | 48 |
| #4 | Jarkko | +1.72 | 73 | 71 |
| #5 | 丂ㄩㄩ尺爪丨乇丂 | +0.67 | 56 | 67 |





