








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1099 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,419 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1700 | 38% |
| Smokes | 1012 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 818 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 889 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $238,621 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 49 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dontavious Lamont | 100% | 7 |
| #2 | NoodlesTheAsian | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | Tyrant | 55% | 77 |
| #4 | PonyoIsKing | 53% | 76 |
| #5 | Poomsta | 52% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Poomsta | 52% | 48 |
| #6 | Reroy | 52% | 87 |
| #7 | Trench_Boi | 46% | 24 |
| #8 | Salty | 29% | 28 |
| #9 | Fsxgaming1 | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PonyoIsKing | 7 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Tyrant | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Poomsta | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Reroy | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Salty | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tyrant | 264 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #2 | Poomsta | 99 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Trench_Boi | 93 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | Salty | 59 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Reroy | 43 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dontavious Lamont | +3.83 | 70 | 16 |
| #2 | SunPigCatForce | +1.60 | 54 | 60 |
| #3 | Tyrant | +1.50 | 27 | 47 |
| #4 | Reroy | +0.83 | 29 | 23 |
| #5 | PonyoIsKing | -1.09 | 6 | 15 |





