








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 659 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 436 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4898 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,901 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2171 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3244 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2179 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2307 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,642,544 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 304 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zokkine | 52% | 302 |
| #2 | bl4nk | 50% | 28 |
| #3 | jorenzo | 50% | 186 |
| #4 | Sementtisetä | 50% | 127 |
| #5 | Syrex⊕ | 48% | 184 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | bl4nk | 50% | 28 |
| #3 | jorenzo | 50% | 186 |
| #4 | Sementtisetä | 50% | 127 |
| #5 | Syrex⊕ | 48% | 184 |
| #6 | - Muti$ & Ystävät - | 48% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jorenzo | 25 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | Sementtisetä | 12 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Syrex⊕ | 10 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Zokkine | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | - Muti$ & Ystävät - | 5 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jorenzo | 386 | 0.10 | 10 min |
| #2 | Sementtisetä | 287 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Zokkine | 232 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #4 | - Muti$ & Ystävät - | 80 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Syrex⊕ | 65 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kroko | +2.23 | 76 | 55 |
| #2 | - Muti$ & Ystävät - | +0.53 | 67 | 47 |
| #3 | Sementtisetä | +0.32 | 78 | 63 |
| #4 | jorenzo | -0.20 | 64 | 61 |
| #5 | Zokkine | -1.43 | 58 | 45 |





